Believe

"Believe"
Digitally Enhanced Photograph

Sonia Choquette, a wonderful spiritual author, says that what you consciously desire and what you subconsciously believe about that desire must be in agreement in order to succeed. If I subconsciously harbor beliefs that are in conflict with my goals, I'll stay stuck. I think this last week I've been feeling this way. So much anger, much of it old and unresolved open wounds regarding lack of support, has come up within me, rendering me almost paralyzed to create anything. Consciously, I want to be creatively expressive, but on some deep level the demons were taking hold of me.
So I embraced those emotions, as painful as they felt, and went on long walks and meditated much of the week. I also mulled over a few other words that Sonia talked about. She says to focus on believing in the value your desires will bring those who are around you. Creating from a desire to contribute seems to bypass all those subconscious beliefs getting in your way. I took all these words in and let them soak for awhile.
Then yesterday, something broke within me. Some inner resistance crumbled and I was actually able to create for much of the day, creating new artistic pieces, working on photos and printing them out. The statue image above was the final creation I did before I called it a day. I took a photo of her out at a Wooded Catholic sanctuary where nuns live and then painted human features, which I often like to do with inanimate objects. This seems to personalize them. I was going to leave the background greyish black but then some voice within me said "Make some colored circles, like halos in a sense". So I did. The image above is dedicated to where I am at in my own life right now. Everything is unfolding just as it should. I look out to the world and thank my higher power, spiritual guides and believing mirrors that surround me.